Do you cheer change and the passing of time in life or does it depend on the events? This end of school year/early summer has hit me hard. I feel like I am being emotionally walloped watching our youngest girl finish kindergarten and our oldest, third grade. (This is coupled by the fact that our youngest is turning two next week and that I just watched my father turn 70 years-old.) I guess it means one of two things, that time passes way too quickly or that two years of extreme sleep deprivation makes alien abduction seem more than a remote possibility. I was abducted 25 two minutes ago!
Perhaps I am feeling the weight of my personal estrogen load. It has surpassed my carbon one. All the clichés, truisms, sayings, what have you, about the passing of time have more truth to them than I ever realized or thought I’d feel. But I guess I never approached middle age before either.
It has been a year of so many highs, joined with a few lows. The first full day of school passed; the first homework was completed; and first friendships took hold. First shoes were tied; first teeth fell out; and first sleepovers occurred. Both girls made their public speaking debut in their 4-H clubs, with ( I must say) incredible results. Our third grader began to devour books. The Ancient Greek gods and goddesses became regular guests in our home as Rick Riordan and his Olympians series shared our dinner table, van rides, and many moments that were quiet before it. Just a few weeks ago, our oldest wanted to wear a certain shirt because it reminded her of the tunic that her favorite goddess in the book series wore. Ahh yes, the mouth of babes.
This year we were introduced to the common core standards and experienced a sharp rise in homework. We had our first “existential” crisis with school with both girls, over different issues. It seems fatigue and the sense of being pushed too hard was probably the culprit. There was the strange cough and fever around Christmas and the walking pneumonia around spring break. The joys of little children with imperfect personal hygiene, all assembled in one building….
We watched them grow. The physical growth spurts came and went during the year. -More clichés about growing overnight the reality. We saw a new maturity in both girls and an expanding of their unique personalities. Our girl who wanted to be a horse trainer, now wants to be a writer. Our youngest now wants to be an illustrator and a scientist. Ask me about snails and I will tell you one funny little story.
So I take pause, but try to find humor in these profound moments and days of the end of the school year and the start of summer. However, the lump in my throat, as I regard my children and my life these days, gets in the way. Fortunately the joy of these sweet things is a comfort.